Welcome to the Monthly Newsletter by Amer Kaissi 

Edition #43, July 2023

Many regular readers of the newsletter know that I am passionate about the importance of humility & ambition- being a humbitious leader. A question that I regularly get after I speak on the topic is: “What about all those narcissists and jerks that succeed as leaders? How do we make sense of that?” The book that I am sharing with you all in this edition- “The Narcissist Next Door”- aims to answer that question.

In this well-researched book, journalist & editor Jeffrey Kluger makes sure to distinguish between clinical Narcissists (what he calls Narcissism with a capital-N and which exists in only 1-3% of the population), and others who exhibit narcissistic traits along a long continuum (a much larger proportion). The main point from the book is that narcissists of all types tend to emerge more into leadership positions, but they are not effective leaders in the long-run.

He explains: “Narcissists finds their way into almost any business organization, where they succeed brilliantly, crash spectacularly, thrive and die and charm and alienate in seemingly equal measure- often in the span of a very short stay before moving on.” The main reason that narcissists are chosen more for leadership position is most organizations’ overreliance on the job interview, a setting where over-confident and charming narcissists have a very clear advantage over the rest of the population. Moreover, most workplaces are tilted in the narcissists’ direction- rewarding cockiness, energy, and loud mouths, and ignoring or even penalizing quiet competence and thoughtfulness.

If you are working with a narcissist, report to one, or are in a relationship with one, I highly recommend this book!

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Dr. Amer Kaissi is a Top Leadership Keynote Speaker. He speaks about leadership, teams and culture.