So often, when we are coaching young leaders who doubt themselves, we advise them: “You need to increase your confidence.” This advice is not helpful for two main reasons. First, it lacks specificity and doesn’t tell the other person what exactly they should do. Second, and most importantly, it is just wrong advice according to the latest evidence from scientific studies. Instead of advising people to increase their confidence (how good they think they are), we should ask them to develop their competence (how good they actually are), and their confidence will follow.
Our society and workplaces place a high premium on being confident and feeling good. But psychological research shows us that having low confidence is actually not a bad thing. Yes, you read that right. Low confidence that is based on a realistic assessment of our own competence is actually much better than high confidence that is based on distorting reality and self-serving biases. In fact, having feelings of low confidence is a necessary first step to realize that our competence is not where we want it to be and to start working on gaining new skills, knowledge and abilities. The newly developed competence will eventually lead to real accomplishments and positive feedback, which ultimately allow us to feel confident about ourselves. Instead of prioritizing feeling good, we should focus on becoming better.
In his important but little-known book “Confidence: How Much You Really Need and How to Get It,” organizational psychologist Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic explores the latest scientific research and explains the importance of competence over confidence. He notes: “Contrary to what some biographers and self-nominated experts suggest, Barack Obama did not become the first black president in U.S. history because he was confident; Sir Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin, did not establish four hundred companies because of his confidence; Madonna has not sold three hundred million records because of her self-belief; and Michael Jordan, Muhammad Ali, and Roger Federer did not achieve total domination of their sports because they felt good about themselves. The reason these exceptional achievers have confidence is that they are exceptionally competent.” Chamorro-Premuzic explains that while we all want confidence, it is not really what we need- what we need is competence.
Take the example of Gina, one of our graduate students (not her real name). When she first started her studies in health care administration, she was lacking in confidence and didn’t view herself as a leader. She was extremely self-critical and always had a self-doubt voice in the back of her mind. As she progressed in her courses, her confidence increased slightly as her levels of knowledge and skills improved. But when she began her administrative residency (fellowship) at a large health system, many of the self-doubts resurfaced as she thought that maybe she wasn’t “cut out to play with the big dogs.” With support and encouragement from her mentors and professors, she immersed herself in learning about the organization and started taking on increasingly complicated projects. Six months into her residency year, and with two major projects under her belt, she now finally feels confident in her abilities. Her newly found confidence did not come out of thin air or delusional thoughts- it came directly from her newly acquired competence and from the positive feedback the she received after delivering a major presentation and contributing to saving the health system hundreds of thousands of dollars.
The take-home point for leaders, coaches and educators it that there is no real evidence suggesting that high confidence actually causes competence. It is actually the other way round. Instead of seeking “incompetent confidence,” we should ask for feedback and work tirelessly on improving our competence, in order to achieve long-lasting “realistic confidence.”
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Dr. Amer Kaissi is Keynote Speaker on Workplace Culture.
